Boundaries, do you have them and do you reinforce them?
Most will say yes, but even I witness myself buckle from time to time, truth be told. My knowledge of people & personalities has brought much awareness over the years and I have boundaries in place to protect myself.
My tolerance for bullshit is null, as most are quick to observe, and I’m quite unwilling to waver these days. I used to “yes” everyone to death and it was crushing me to feel the need to be everything to everyone. People, no one made me do it, I assumed that shitty role for myself! And why? Many women do, but the realization over what it was doing to me and my health, made me pull the plug on it. To think, I was gifting myself stress and anxiety by the boatload due to these behaviors was just disappointing, so I stopped.
The shift was derived from the confidence in knowing my worth, not something I’ve always had, but something I’ve strived for and am proud to hold close now. I will guard and protect that because I know what was involved in acquiring it.
Just as in health and wellness, many are unwilling to do the work, but have you ever noticed those willing to run back to abusive relationships, ill-serving friendships, relationships and those continually stressed and anxiety stricken because they’re perpetual people pleasers? Right, that was also once me.
The confidence you gain in guarding yourself against those no longer meant for you and situations no longer serving you, will soon follow. Mark my words! When you know better, you have the innate ability to do better. You can change things, you’ve got the power.
Taking inventory, asking yourself the tough questions with real, raw honesty in your answers, putting in the work, self reflection and daily practice, can all assist in clearly defining your goals and outlook and ultimately your approach to get you there. Even if it means trimming some fat in the process and I’m sorry to advise it will, this is all part of your growth. All can come from the simple desire to continually improve and learn, so start the process of raising your standards and implementing new boundaries and it will begin to unfold.