I want to attempt to put into words what this experience has been for me. I’ve been through all the highs and lows of training and dieting in order to present my best package. I feel like all of my efforts shined through when I walked on that stage Friday night. I felt great up there, amazing in fact. Confident, poised and more comfortable in my own skin then I’ve ever been. I know this is where I belong. It feels entirely too natural for me to think otherwise. I unravel beforehand, but when its show time, its game on baby. Lola comes out to play.
After the line up, they began first call out. I heard my number and walked front and center where there was an opening. I wasn’t aware I was doing it, it just happened subconsciously. They began to move all the girls around for side to side comparison and left me right where I was. I was in the middle and they were comparing all the other girls to me. I just kept smiling and realizing it was happening. I was going to make it to Nationals. I don’t think I ever really had a doubt, after all, I’ve seen this moment in my mind for many weeks.
It’s been nearly 4 years since I’ve been on stage. Immediately following my 3rd place finish at the Excalibur, we decided to have our third child. We had our first boy, who will turn 4 in January. I would’ve liked to continue the path I was on, but other priorities were more important to me at the time. I took one for the team and the dream to compete again diminished into a cloud of smoke. I knew it would likely never happen again or that it would be quite awhile if it did. I just figured I’d get over it and never really want that for myself again. Timing is everything, but I never regretted having the most amazing son anyone could ask for. He was destined to be here and my dreams turned out to be put on a temporary hold.
This sport can be hard on everyone around the competitor. Figuring out what your body responds best to and working it numerous ways until you find the best recipe. This can make you cranky and exhausted, leaving not much of you for anyone else. For me, this has been the hardest part of it all, but I will find a better way next time. Watching those judges eyeing me was intense. It was hard to contain my complete satisfaction that came from knowing my hard work was not in vain as I was seeing the approval in their eyes. Saturday night came, the night of the finals, and the results I had hoped for. I had won my class and was on my way to Nationals.
I’d like to thank Team Bombshell and my coach IFBB Figure Pro Gennifer Strobo for her guidance to help get me to that stage. She had me eating pancakes all the way up until the end in the hopes of filling me out. I had no complaints about that part. I’d also like to thank Larry Schlesinger of GET SOME Xtremewear. Very proud to wear the GET SOME name as Larry is a great guy to associate with and the other athletes have been so supportive. To my amazing husband and children-without you guys I would never be here. You make me want to push harder each day and to always better myself. My parents came out to watch for the first time ever. It was extra special winning with them looking on in the audience. I’m the luckiest girl in the world!
From a once very shy kid, to the extrovert you see today, we all make choices in this lifetime. I decided long ago that in order to be everything I ever wanted for myself, I would have to make it happen. I’ve never had expectations beyond working hard for the things that are important to me. To be on that stage in front of all those people, just feels right. I know this moment wont last forever, nor do I want it to. I train hard and compete because it is something that gives me a feeling of power, confidence, strength and beauty. I love the feeling of being in control of what I am and what I want to be. We all have this same fire inside of us. Use yours to better yourself in some way. You’ll only wonder why you waited so long.
Some candids from the weekend